Tomorrow, I will have been a mother for two years: My baby boy is celebrating his second birthday. Everything I will write about motherhood in this post, has been written before. In fact, it has been written so many times it is practically cliche. And nevertheless, it still amazes me that it applies... to me.
Motherhood changes you. Everyone told me I'd change once I have a child, and my response was always that my priorities may change, but my inherent character would remain the same. I was wrong.
Two years later I am definitely not the same girl/woman I was before. It's not just my priorities that have changed -
- It's my ability to love. My son, of course, but not just him. My love for my son has in many ways opened and deepened my heart in general, towards so many other people in my life.
- It's the way I judge other people - the qualities I can now see in them that I never saw before. Qualities like patience, nurturing tendencies, pedagogy skills. Before all I saw and all I appreciated was business skills.
- It's my capability to sacrifice myself - my health, my career, even my marriage if that's what it took - for someone else. That is something I never would have believed possible
And in what could appear contradictory to the latter:
- It's my ability to put myself first. Understanding that someone in this world completely depends on me has given me the strength to take care of "me" without the guilt I would have suffered before.
Because "me" is not just "me" anymore. It's also "mom". A mother of a two year old.
A healthy, smart, wonderful, two year old that has turned my entire world upside down, for better and for worse.
This has been the year that my baby boy took his first step, said his first word, sang his first song, danced his first dance, rode his first "baby car", gave me the first intentional hug and kiss, threw his first tantrum...
I wonder what the next year holds.
Happy Birthday, my beloved Daniel.
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